Why athletes can't get regular jobs....

Discussion in 'The SRTConnection Lounge' started by HEMISFEAR, Dec 14, 2007.

  1. HEMISFEAR

    HEMISFEAR Ur Friendly Canadian

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    My favorites: What da problem is? and "Did you axe me a question"?


    Why athletes can't get regular jobs...

    1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the kids to copulate me."

    2. New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."

    3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skins say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."

    4. Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings."

    5. Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann, 1996: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

    6. Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh : "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."

    7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State Football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."

    8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton "

    9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left Wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes"

    10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning, regardless of what time it is."

    11. Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."

    12. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject."

    13. Amarillo High School and Oiler coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips responded: "Because she is too ugly to kiss good-bye."
     
  2. SRT8bby

    SRT8bby Full Access Member

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    Dahahaha - - LMAO

    This was great. I'm e-mailing this to everyone in the world.
     
  3. Cygnus

    Cygnus Platinum Supporting Member

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    lol
     
  4. Ruff N Tuff RT

    Ruff N Tuff RT THE PAVEMENT IS MY CANVAS

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    thats some funny $#*t
     
  5. markus

    markus Silver Supporting Members

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    dude thats HILARIOUS
     
  6. Hemi@last

    Hemi@last Stil Quik

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    some real classics there - hilarious!
     
  7. StevoSRT

    StevoSRT Moderator

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    I was watching monday night football last year...and they were going through the colleges...and i sht you not some guy on the seahawks honestly was like "John Alexander Elementary School" or something like that...i was like...wow hope hes really good and saves his money haha