Post Whore Thread

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Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates really hard, he can help his team. If his team is in trouble, he coaches the players from the living room. If they are really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

 

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If it's attention you want, don't get involved with a man during play-off season.

 

Men like phones with lots of buttons. It makes them feel important.

 

Men love to be the first to read the newspaper in the morning. Not being the first is upsetting to their psyches.

 

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All men look nerdy in black socks and sandals.

 

The way a man looks at himself in the mirror will tell you if he can ever care about anyone else.

 

Don't try to teach men how to do anything in public. They can learn in private; in public they have to KNOW.

 

Men who are going bald often wear baseball caps.

 

All men are afraid of eyelash curlers. I sleep with one under my pillow instead of a gun.

 

A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner. These men usually have jobs and bathe.

 

Men love watches with multiple functions. My husband has one that is a combination address book, telescope and piano.

 

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All men hate to hear "We need to talk." No matter what the subject is, these seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Norman Schwarzkopf.

 

Men are sensitive in strange ways. If a man has built a fire and the last log doesn't burn, he will take it personally.

 

Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.